KARMA

I may have written a post like this before, but here it goes.

I realize that I am one of those people (or people who are aware that) God punishes.
That's right PUNISHES! DISCIPLINES! HUMBLES!

out of love of course.

I can NEVER get away with anything.

I always see people who do whatever they want such as climbing over fences for shortcuts, sharing homework, and taking too much food from a church buffet. They show no remorse and just go one and get away with it!

But can I do it?

NO!

If I ever do anything dishonest or excessive, I get punished for it, right away!

EXAMPLES:

1. In 10th grade, went to Magic Mountain with youth group (when I was president) and told them "don't lose your parners or you're screwed!" AND I LOST MY PARTNER! more like she followed some guy that she thought was me halfway to the other side of the park! (4 hours of looking and searching (she had no phone)) ruined my entire day.

2. Freshman year, was mean to a guy, and later "used him" for a ride to the mall for banquet shopping. Thought all was well and went to go eat out afterwards, but at the restaurant, placed my order and they forgot it. Got my food 5 minutes before everyone finished and asked for the check. Lonely dining without food. Put it in a box, which I stupidly left at the restaurant.

3. Two weeks ago, realized that a customer left a dollar accidently. Could have gone after her, but didn't. Had the worst two weeks ever! Today, saw her and gave it back to her. Feeling of peace.

SOME THINGS I DON'T DO ANYMORE
1. Buy expensive clothes (they always get ruined one way or another, no matter what!) The colors malfunction (even after handwashing), jeans get ripped, shoes get ripped.

2. Look at bad stuff on the internet (I got punished badly when I did this) I still remember the last date I did this was May 9, 2004. I realized that even doing this in secret was hurting my family and not setting a good example for my brother.

3. Take what's not mine. I hate it when people take my stuff but if I take other people's stuff, I get punished.

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On another note, I realized that all this time, I have been complaining about my circumstances and how I can't afford the things I use to and how I can't graduate this year, but I realize that there are people who have a lot less than I do. Looking at many of the people here, A lot less.

EXAMPLES:
1. Not everyone can go to college. Most people don't have the fiancial means. For most people I've seen around here, life is just a fight for survival. With 5 brothers and sisters at home, for many, going to college is not an option.

2. Money to save. It's one thing to have money to pay the rent and for food, but it's an entire different story to have money to save. For people here, losing $5.00 is a huge deal, considering that the minimum wage isn't even $7.00.

3. Having a job. I use to be SO angry that I had to give up a white collar job at an office with my own desk and computer. I realize now, that I took that for granted. There are so many people who would kill for what I had. Here, getting promoted to manager at a fast food restaurant is a huge deal. I see parents proudly bragging that their middle aged children are managing Dairy Queens and Arby's. There are people around here who can't even find work at the market. Having a job alone is something to be very proud of, no matter what it is.

4. Decent Clothing. Here, many people wear their t-shirts inside out. Reason is, because they can't afford to do laundry. I see people wearing the same shirt with holes in it every day.

5. A loving family. So many people here have parents who had them and didn't love them. I can see it in their eyes and how they treat their children. They will buy their cigarettes and if their 5 year old kid asks for some candy, they say "No, I am getting MY stuff, you get your own"

CAN IT BE?

6 short weeks before I leave Texas?
so close,
yet so very far

As the World Turns

Things change rather quickley.
Think of all of the things that we used to have but we don't have anymore:

1. Anyone remember Robinsons May? I used to like that store.
2. What about Tower Records? They went bankrupt in 2006.
3. Charter Communications is gone.
4. I never went to Circuit City much, but that's gone too.
5. Gottschalk's is gone too. Remember the Gottschalk's department store at the Riverside Plaza? Well, the building that it was in is the only remaining building of the Original Plaza.
6. KB Toys Folded in February of this year. Surprisingly, this chain would have done REALLY well when I was younger and kids actually played with toys.
7. Mervyn's was an okay store. I went to Kohl's most of the time though.
8. Shoe Pavillion was the ONLY place where I bought shoes. Why did they go bankrupt? Now I have to find a new shoe store. This is something I will miss.
9. Steve and Barry's really wasn't my store. They sold a bunch of t-shirts with cartoons and funny phrases on them, but I don't wear those kind of clothes.
10. The Sharper Image was one store that I wished that I could afford to shop at someday. They sold a lot of cool gadgets and stuff, although I admit, most of it was too excessive.

They say more brands are in danger of being taken away like Borders Bookstores, Old Navy, KMart, Gateway, Yahoo!, and Motorola.

Tired of Texas

This morning, this one girl was like "You look like Bobby Lee"

So I made a straight face and with my famous condescending voice I said

"Do you need something"

and her smiling face dropped! haha! I completely ruined her day. I guess I can take my attitude anywhere haha!

She bought some gas and left without another word.

TEXANS ARE SOOOOOO SLOW!

My goodness!

Yesterday, my mom wanted to get some sort of a treat and we heard about this new Yogurt place that opened up here in town called YoYo's Yogurt (owned by a Korean aquaintance) and we went.

Luckily, there were only about 10 people ahead of us, but guess how long it took us to self serve our own yogurt and toppings and get to the front to weigh in. 49 cents an ounce by the way.

20 FRIKEN MINUTES!

OMG!

Why are Texans so slow? They're like having conversations in line and going like "oh lookie they have a cheesecake yogurt, oh look let's eat this" and like watching the news on the big screens and saying things like "I like that celebrity look look!"

and to make it worse, they were soooo indecisive for their toppings.

I just want to get in and out of the line b/c we know that yogurt melts and mushy yogurt tastes like poo out of a baby's diaper.

However, these people were like "is this all you have?" and like "when did you slice this fruit? is it fresh?" and asking stupid questions like "what's coconut jelly?, what's boba? what's lichee?" I guess I can't hate them for not knowing much about the Asian pop culture food.

These people were seriously taking WAY too much time to just get yogurt.

But the thing is, everyone behind us (a crowd came later) were the same. They didn't care that the line was slow (although ridiculously slow) and were just soaking up the atmosphere (which I can't deny was very well decorated.).

In the end, I paid about $7 for the both of us and we enjoyed our mushy yogurt.

Just Another Day

Okay, so I turn 22 today.

big woop.

Today is just like any day, but I wish it was a more special day.

I don't like telling people this, but whenever I had to work on holidays such as Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, New Years, New Years Day, Easter, and of course, today, my birthday (although it really isn't a general holiday), it feels like my heart is bleeding.

Then I get emotional.

then emotionally hard.

When people came in and were like "Merry Christmas" or "Happy New Year" or "Wow you have to work today, that sucks", I just wanted to say STFU BTCH!

Sad

I wish I could sit in the rain under an umbrella right now and think quietly to myself.

single digets

FINALLY

9 weeks before summer school starts.

not 10

not 20

9

9
9
9
9
9
9
9
9

Next week will be a sonnet of 8's perhaps

almost time to see the people I miss the most

and the one person who is always there for me.